Day 5: Breaking Free - My Journey Through Social Media Addiction
A Yoga Teacher Finding Balance in Our Dopamine Driven World
The Content Creation Mindset
I think in content creation.
Which I kind of already knew, but I think I realized the depth of in the last five days. A lot of my actions and decisions are filtered through the lens of how it might appear on Instagram. Somewhere along the way, social media became a second layer of reality, a backdrop to my sober yoga journey, and eventually, a dopamine-fueled addiction. This realization has led me to reexamine my relationship with social media and its deeper impact on my mental health, relationships, and spiritual practice.
A Double-Edged Sword
When I started sharing vulnerably on social media, it wasn’t about building a following. My posts on Facebook and Instagram were raw and real, reflecting the highs and lows of my sobriety journey. They helped me process my emotions and inspired others. Over time, my audience grew—from 2,000 to over 20,000 followers.
What started as a tool for connection and healing shifted subtly. The likes, comments, and shares became small dopamine hits that kept me coming back for more. Neuroscience tells us that dopamine, the neurotransmitter linked to pleasure and reward, can reinforce behavior—whether it’s posting on social media or scrolling endlessly. Over time, this loop can create addiction-like tendencies, making it harder to detach.
The practice of yoga is supposed to support us in resolving such addictions and issues - but I think I was so unaware or unawake to my addiction that for the past few years, it wasn’t possible. Sutra 1.2 defines yoga as the cessation of the fluctuations of the mind (yogas chitta vritti nirodhah). Yet, my engagement with social media felt like anything but stillness. Instead, it mirrored the restless waves of craving, comparison, and validation.
Dopamine and Instant Validation
Social media is designed to keep us hooked. Studies have shown that the dopamine release from likes, comments, and shares mirrors the pleasure we get from food or even addictive substances. For someone in recovery like me, this mechanism felt eerily familiar. I think it’s common - the number of people who become sober and then build sober Instagram accounts and become sober influencers is massive.
In the Twelve Steps, Step One emphasizes admitting powerlessness over addiction. Social media became another form of compulsion—a way to fill a void, distract myself, and seek external affirmation. And so I guess me creating this Substack is step one. The Buddha taught in the Four Noble Truths that craving is the root of suffering. So understanding that all of the dopamine related cravings on social media is one of the causes of my suffering is my first step forward.
When Authenticity Gets Lost
In the early days of my Instagram journey, my posts were authentic. I shared long captions, mini-essays about sobriety, and yoga philosophy. They resonated with others, and supported lots of people on their recovery journeys. These posts even became the foundation of my book, Sober Yoga Girl.
But as algorithms shifted and engagement metrics ruled the game, I began creating content not from my heart but for the dopamine hits. Vulnerable stories turned into staged TikToks, and mindful essays were replaced with seven-second reels designed to "hook" audiences. My authentic voice became muffled by strategies aimed at growth.
Yoga philosophy warns against asmita (ego-identity), one of the kleshas (afflictions) described in the Yoga Sutras. The more I chased likes and followers, the more I identified with this digital version of myself—and the more distant I became from my true essence.
The Emotional Cost of Social Media
Social media’s toxicity runs deeper than just metrics. It’s also about what we consume. Sutra 1.33 advises cultivating compassion, joy, and equanimity while avoiding pleasure in others’ suffering. Yet, I found myself scrolling through acquaintances’ dramas, refreshing posts, and reading comments out of curiosity.
Even positive posts had unintended consequences. Last month, witnessing my situationship’s vacation posts stirred annoyance and hurt, even though I had no desire to reconnect. My brain has no need to even be aware of that vacation happening.
The Buddha’s teachings on right mindfulness remind us to observe these emotions without attachment. This is a skill I’ve gotten better and better at as the years progress. But in the endless scroll, mindfulness often takes a backseat. And I believe that people who have no foundation of mindfulness would struggle tremendously with this.
Finding Stillness: Yoga Off the Mat
This weekend, I taught my first in person drop-in yoga classes in Bali in six weeks. It was so good to be back. The room was full, and I felt deeply connected to my students. Unlike social media, where validation is fleeting, the energy in the room was tangible and lasting.
I started to think more and more about a lot of my life choices. I’ve felt driven in the last few years to fundraise for investors to buy a retreat center in Bali. I’ve also started to run international retreats around the world, making my life extremely jet-setting. Whilst I LOVE running these retreats, I’ve started to wonder - is this truly, authentically, what I want? Do I want the stress of owning a retreat center? Do I want the stress of so much travel? Or was a lot of this for the image of what a “successful” yoga teacher looks like? Would I be happier just having a little house in Bali and teaching drop-in yoga classes? The truth for me is that I want to live a life of service. Social media has, in some ways, skewed my understanding of what is true for me.
As I reflected on the experience, I realized how much more fulfilled I feel actually teaching yoga, whether it’s running an online Yoga Sutra Study course, leading support groups, teaching drop in yoga, etc - compared to chasing engagement online. The Yoga Sutras remind us that true joy comes from inner stillness, not external gratification.
Even scientifically, stepping away from social media has profound benefits. Dopamine detox practices—taking breaks from the constant stimulation of likes and notifications—can help rewire the brain, reducing impulsive behavior and restoring balance.
Letting Go of Fear: Social Media and Entrepreneurship
One of my greatest fears in leaving social media was its perceived impact on my business. I know a lot of entrepreneurs share similar fears - and might be hesitating in leaving, for that reason. Yet, in the past week since stepping back, my yoga community has continued to thrive. New members have joined my membership. someone signed up for my UAE retreat, and registrations for my Yoga Sutra Study have come in.
I also think when the veils have dropped for me around social media, I’ve begun to wonder if some of the financial choices I make related to social media are really necessary. For example, I pay for a podcast production team for Sober Yoga Girl Podcast because I don’t have enough time to edit my episodes and create reels promoting them. However, I’ve found in the last week alone I’ve been able to create a couple episodes on my own and publish them. By cutting the production team, I’ll be saving money. The need to have them was directly related to my Instagram addiction - because of my lack of time to edit the episodes on my own, and also the lack of time to create Reels promoting them (which I now feel are unneeded). With my newfound clarity I also have made a number of financial decisions for the health of the business which feel right and will be carving a new, sustainable, path forward. I don’t think my brain would be clear enough to sort this all out if I were on social media.
This aligns with the teachings of surrender in yoga and the Twelve Steps: when we let go of control, we create space for abundance. My business seems to thrive not because of constant posts but because of the authenticity and connection that underpin the choice to be offline.
A Path Forward
As I move forward, I am reimagining my relationship with social media. Like alcohol, I think I am learning that I cannot moderate it, and I believe admitting my powerlessness is the first step (like step one of the twelve steps). But I can step back, reflect, figure out if there is a way to engage mindfully (for example - right now I have a social media manager running The Mindful Life Practice Instagram and I could maybe give her access to my personal account to run it for me) — or, I might decide to just leave the accounts open and there for people to look at, but no longer use them at all.
Yoga teaches us to practice aparigraha (non-attachment) and santosha (contentment). By applying these principles, I hope to break free from the addictive cycle of social media and return to my authentic self.
What about you? Have you found a balance with social media, or does it feel like a never-ending spiral? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
If it also feels like a never-ending spiral for you, I am calling you in. Join our 30 Day Social Media Detox. It’s free online and we’d love to have you part of it.